Love

Being a woman is tough.  However, I would think that being married to a woman is even harder.  I know that I ask questions that have no right answers.  I can be unreasonably moody and just plain unreasonable.  But something that I have started to think about it why I demand to know why my husband loves me.  I don't know if you ask this question, even if it is not out loud, but it is something I did not know I struggled with until I watched MercyMe in concert.  The lead singer asked a question that totally changed my perspective.  He asked "Why do you love God"  He said that most people would say "Because he saved me"  "Salvation"  It is something like what came to my mind right away.  Then he gave an example:

I ask my five year old son, "why do you love your mom"  He says things like, because she makes me peanut butter sandwiches and tucks me in at night.  That is an immature kind of love.  That is love that depends on actions.  What I hope for my son when he is 25, is that when he is asked that question his answer is "because shes my mom"  (here is added that he hoped she still wasn't making his sandwiches and tucking him in)  The correct response to why we love God should be, because he is God!  Yes, the things He has done is awesome, but we should love Him for who He is.  Worshipping the gifts from the Creator instead of the Creator is a sin.

This goes along with something my friend just posted. 

"Reading the Bible to extract it's "life lessons" puts much of the focus on the reader...but the real story...is about the Author"

Sometimes we forget that what the Bible is, is a glimpse of who God is.  And He is amazing.  Sometimes we set up a lesson and search the Bible to confirm what we want to learn about.  But He just wants us to get to know Him.  Even the creation shows who He is. 

Having a baby like Mercy shows me this in a new way.  Of course I love my children, but sometimes I wish that they would just be perfect and not drive me crazy.  AS if they are purposely trying to ruin my day by misbehaving.  When I think about Mercy, I know she will never be able to do anything to "make" me love her.  She isn't going to get perfect grades, or a good job, or have children.  She isn't going to write poetry or keep her room clean (if she can, I assure you I will make her though)  I love her for her.  I love her for who she is going to be, even though the world says it is not "quality" life. 

I am trying to just love my children, even though sometimes they make me crazy.  I am trying to speak love to my children, even when they break my favorite knick knack.  I am trying to show love to my children, even when I have too many other things to do, because I do love them.  The good things that they do are just a bonus and a blessing instead of some kind of marker for how much I love them that day.  I am trying to not demand to know why my husband loves me.  It is enough when he says "because you are you"  I don't need to be loved because I keep the house clean (which I don't do so well anyway) or because I cook for him or even because I stay home with the kids.  He loves me because I am McKenzie, I am his wife.  Just I love him because he is Mark.  Everything he does is just icing on the cake.  I am making sure that is enough for me.